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A partially deaf gentleman was extolling the virtues of his new hearing
aid. "It's marvelous," he enthused to a friend. "Since I acquired it I can
hear the birds chirping on the hearth. I can also hear clearly a
conversation being held in an apartment a full block away!"
"You don't say," said his friend. "What kind is it?"
The proud owner consulted his wristwatch and answered, "Twenty minutes
after two."
Send this joke to a friend 1 Two cows were talking in the field one day.
First Cow: Have you heard about the Mad Cow disease that's going around?
Second Cow: Yeah, makes you glad you're a penguin, doesn't it?
Send this joke to a friend 2 What's brown and sticky?
A stick.
Send this joke to a friend 3 This fellow dies and goes to heaven. God offers to answer three questions.
guy: "Why are girls so pretty?"
God: "So you'll like them."
guy: "Why are girls soft?"
God: "So you'll like them."
guy: "Why are girls so dumb?"
God: "So they'll like you."
Send this joke to a friend 4 The other day my house caught fire. The insurance agent said, "Shouldn't
be a problem. What kind of coverage do you have?" I said, "Fire and
theft."
Insurance agent frowned. "Uh oh. Wrong kind. Should be fire OR theft."
Apparently, the only way I can make a claim with this coverage is if the
house is robbed while it's burning down.
Send this joke to a friend 5