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There was a young lady from Asia
Who shaved her legs with a razor
One day she went high
Right up past here thigh
And the gash it left would amaze ya!
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1
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Eyed the girls and had a ball,
Lots of whistles, even a catcall,
Thus... Humpty had a great fall!
Then came the cold winter breeze
and Humpty's arse began to freeze...
though winter's sure to be a dreary thing...
Let's wish Humpty a bouncy spring!
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2
Mary had a little lamb,
The news made every front page,
With pictures of her being taken to jail,
Cause you see, he was under age.
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3
He's teaching her arithmetic, he said it was his mission.
He kissed her once, he kissed her twice and said, "Now that's addition."
And as he added smack by smack, in silent satisfication,
she sweetly gave the kisses back and said, "Now that's subtraction."
Then he kissed her, she kissed him without an explanation.
And both together smiled and said, "That's multiplication."
Then Dad appeared upon the scene and made a quick decision.
He kicked that kid three blocks away and said, "That's long division!"
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4
There once was a woman from France,
Who did an unusual dance.
She'd roll in the grass,
And lick her own ass,
Her sex would put men in a trance.
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5
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