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Drive carefully. 90% of the people on the road are caused by accident.
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1
The company sergent is briefing the recruits: "For the next ten weeks the commanding officer will be your father, and I will be your mother. Incidentally we are not married, so you know what that makes you..."
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2
Two men were changing in the locker room after a game of tennis. One notices the other one is putting on pair of stockings and suspenders. He says "When did you start wearing them?" To which the other man replies "Since my wife found a pair on the back seat of the car."
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3
What is the Australian for foreplay? Brace yourself, Sheila! And the Welsh? Are you awake, Gwen?
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4
Why'd the monkey fall outta the tree? 'cause he was dead... Why'd the other monkey fall outta the tree? 'cause he was dead too... Why'd the third monkey fall outta the tree? peer pressure...
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5
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