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There once was an apple-cheeked runt
Who was welcomed with joy at the Front.
This God's gift to he-men
Prevented spilled semen,
For his ass was tattooed like a cunt.
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1
There was a young fellow named Simon
Who tried to discover a hymen,
But he found every girl
Had relinquished her pearl
In exchange for a solitaire diamond.
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2
There was a young lady of Exeter,
So pretty, that men craned their necks at her.
One was even so brave
As to take out and wave
The distinguishing mark of his sex at her.
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3
There was a young student of Yale
Who was getting his first piece of tail.
He shoved in his pole,
But in the wrong hole,
And a voice from beneath yelled: "No sale!"
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4
There was a young lady of Arden,
Who s----d off a man in a garden.
He said, "My dear Flo,
Where does that stuff go?"
And she said, "(swallow hard)-- I beg pardon?"
1932
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5
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