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This woman is visiting in Israel and notices that her little travel alarm needs a battery. She looks for a watch repair shop and while she doesn't read Hebrew she finally sees a shop with clocks and watches in the window. She goes in and hands the man her clock. The man says, "Madam, I don't repair clocks. I am a Mohel. I do circumcisions." She says, "Why all the clocks in the window?" And he says, "And what should I have in my window?"
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1
The doctor comes out of the delivery room and says to the father, "I'm sorry to have to tell you this, Mr. Jones, but apparently your child was born with no arms, only one leg, and teeth that project six inches out of its mouth." Mr. Jones cries, "My God! What will we do with such a deformed baby?" The doctor says, "Use it as a rake?"
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2
How many Serbs does in take to change a Lighbulb? It doesn't matter..Theres a Blackout!
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3
God, I was wondering...how long is a million years to you?" God answered, "Son, a million years to me is like a second to you." So the man asks, "God how much is a million dollars to you?" And God answered, "Son a million dollars to me is like one penny to you." So the man asks, "God, can I have one of your pennies?" And God answers, "Just a second son."
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4
Why did the pervert cross the road? He had his dick stuck in the chicken.
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5
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