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Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in a lift with the Spice girls.
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1
If men had PMS/PMT, what would happen? a. The federal government would allocate funds to study it. b. Cramps would become an acceptable reason to apply for permanent disability. c. There would be a federal holiday every 28 days
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2
A buxom blonde wore, at a charity ball, an enormous diamond. "It happens to be the third most famous diamond in the whole world," she boasted. "The first is the Hope Diamond, then comes the Kohinoor, and then comes this one, which is called Lipshitz." "What a diamond!" "How lucky you are!" "Wait, wait, nothing in life is all mazel ", said the diamonded lady, "Unfortunately, with this famous Lipshitz diamond you must take the famous Lipshitz curse!" The ladies buzzed and asked, "And what's the Lipshitz curse?" "Lipshitz," sighed the lady.
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3
A woman and her lover are on the bed in the woman's home, when all of a sudden, they hear the front door open and close. "Oh, no, it's my husband!" The man says, "Where's your back door?" "We don't have a back door" says the woman. The man then asks, "Well, where do you want a back door?"
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4
At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth." Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out. He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father." Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother." Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says, "Then come give your real father a big hug."
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5
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