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"I went to a job interview the other day, the guy asked if I had any questions. I said yes, just one, if you're in a car traveling at the speed of light and you turn your headlights on, does anything happen? He said he couldn't answer that. I told him sorry, but I couldn't work for him then." - Steven Wright
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1
I have learned that if you upset your wife, she nags you. If you upset her even more you get the silent treatment. Don't you think it's worth the extra effort?
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2
If elected, Lieberman will be the first Jew to serve under a President since Monica Lewinsky.
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3
If a tree falls in the forest and no one is around to see it, do the other trees make fun of it?
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4
"... you never, for instance, hear people say, 'Is that a wad of undiscarded belly button fluff, or are you just glad to see me?'..." -- The Usenet Oracle
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5
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