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There was an old maid in Peru
Who'd a dog and a cat and a gnu.
From a sairlor named Harrot
She bought an old parrot,
And he threw in a young cockatoo.
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1
There was a young girl of Cohoes
Who jerked herself off with her nose.
She said, "Yes, I done it,
But just for the fun it
Afforded the folk of Cohoes."
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2
There was a young fellow named Bouch
Who inveigled a girl to a couch.
He said, "Pretty young miss,
I will take you, I wiss,
Horizontally, veritcally, crouch."
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3
Lisped a limp-wristed cowboy named Fay,
"It's a hell of a place to be gay!
I must, on these prairies,
Due to a shortage of fairies,
With the deer and the antelope play!"
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4
There was a young couple named Kelly
Who had to live belly to belly,
Because once, in their haste,
They used library paste
Instead of petroleum jelly.
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5
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