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Little Red Riding Hood was walking through the woods on her way to visit her grandmother, when suddenly The Big Bad Wolf jumped out from behind a tree. "Ah-ha....," The Big Bad Wolf said, "Now I've got you and I'm going to eat you! EAT! EAT! EAT!..." Little Red Riding Hood said angrily, "Damn it, doesn't anybody fuck anymore?"
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1
"Get this." said the bloke to his mates, "Last night while I was down the pub with you guys, a burglar broke into my house. "Did he get anything." his mates asked. "yeah, a broken jaw, six teeth knocked out, and a pair of broken nuts. The wife thought it was me coming home drunk."
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2
Why do Jews wear yarmulkes? Because the little propellers cost extra!
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3
Two prisoners were having a chat. The first one said. "I've go two tickets for the warden's ball, Do you want to buy one?" "No thanks, mate," said the second guy. "I can't dance." "It's not a dance, mate," said the first prisoner. "It's a raffle!"
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4
How many gay men does it take to put in a light bulb? Only one...but it takes an entire Emergency Room to get it out.
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5
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