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Said a lesbian lady, "It's sad;
Of all of the girls that I've had,
None gave me the thrill
Of real rapture until
I learned how to be a tribade."
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1
There was a young girl named Dalrymple
Whose sexual needs were so simple.
She enjoyed the full spasm
Of a perfect orgasm
By frigging herself on a pimple.
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2
A prudish young damsel named Rose
Is particular how men propose.
To "Let's have intercourse,"
She says gaily, "Of course,"
But to "Let's fuck," she turns up her nose,
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3
On his honeymoon sailing the ocean
A tightwad displayed much emotion
When he learned, one fine day,
He'd been fucking away
What could have been bottled as lotion.
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4
There was an old maid in Van Nuys
Who went crazy from making mud pies.
She would fill them with farts
And pickled beef-hearts,
And bake them between her fierce thighs.
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5
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