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Oh, that supple young man of Montrose
Who tickled his tail with his toes!
His landlady said,
As she made up his bed,
"My God! How that man blows his nose!"
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1
There was a young man from Montrose
Who could diddle himself with his toes.
He did it so neat
He fell in love with his feet,
And christened them Myrtle and Rose
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2
There was a young lady of Spain
Who took down her pants on a train.
There was a young porter
Saw more than he orter,
And asked her to do it again.
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3
There was a young man in Hong Kong
Who grew seven fathoms of prong.
It looked, when erect,
About as you'd expect---
When coiled it did not seem so long.
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4
"Last night," said a lassie named Ruth,
"In a long-distance telephone booth,
I enjoyed the perfection
Of an ideal connection---
I was screwed, if you must know the truth."
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5
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