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Little Gregory wakes up in the middle of the night feeling alone and scared. He goes into his mother's room for comfort and he sees his mom standing naked in front of the mirror. She is rubbing her chest and groaning, "I want a man, I want a man." Shaking his head in bewilderment, Gregory takes off to bed. Next night the same thing happens. On the third night, Gregory wakes up and goes into his mom's room but this time there is a man in bed with his mom. Gregory hoofs back to his room and whips off his pajamas, rubs his chest and groans " I want a bike, I want a bike."
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1
Shortly after being assigned to a new base, a Lieutenant and his wife were invited to the Colonel's home for an evening of bridge. The Lieutenant was partnered with the Colonel's wife and vice versa. After many hands, the Lieutenant excused himself to use the toilet, but accidentally left the door ajar. When the sound of splashing echoed through the family room, his wife was greatly embarrassed and attempted to apologize, to which the Colonel's wife smiled demurely, "Don't worry about it; this is the first time all evening that I've been able to tell what he has in his hand."
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2
How is sex like air? It's no big thing unless you aren't getting any.
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3
Wife: Who was that on the phone? Husband: Wrong number. Some guy thought this was the weather bureau. Wife: What did he say? Husband: He asked if the coast was clear...
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4
Q: What is grosser than gross? A: Having a dream about chocolate pudding and then waking up with a spoon in your butt.
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5
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