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If a light sleeper sleeps lighter with the light on, does a hard sleeper sleep harder with a hard on?
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1
A fellow was following a truck in heavy traffic. Every block or so, when they were stopped at a stop light, the driver of the truck would jump out of the cab with a big stick and bang on the side of the cargo bay. He'd then jump back into the cab in time to drive away when the signal changed. The first fellow observed this for several miles, until he could stand it no longer. The next time the truck driver jumped out with the stick, the first fellow jumped out and ran up to him. "I'm sorry to bother you," he said, over the din of the banging, "but I am very curious; could you tell me what you are doing?" Without breaking rhythm, the truck driver replied, "Sure, Mac. Ya see, this here's a six-ton truck but I've got eight tons of canaries aboard, so I've gotta keep two ton of them flying all the time so I don't break an axle".
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2
An eminent teacher and thinker once expressed his philosophy of life succinctly. "When it all boiled down to the essence of truth," the philosopher said, "one just live by a dog’s rule of life: If you can’t eat it or fuck it, piss on it!!!"
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3
Did you know Sex is a crime? Its a misdemeanor - The more I miss de meaner I get..
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4
During World War II, Hitler told his Nazis to rape as may French women as they could then say, "In nine months you will have a baby. Name it Adolf. Heil Hitler!" So a young Nazi soldier, eager to do his duty, dutifully went out and raped a pretty young French girl. He said, "In nine months you will have a baby. Name it Adolf. Heil Hitler!" She replied, "In a few weeks you will have a disease. Name it syphillis. Vive la France!"
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5
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